I know this is a strange topic since we are adopting a SON, but if you know me at all you know that I absolutely LOVE being involved in the lives of pre-teen/teenage girls. I am honored to be able to be a part of several really awesome girls’ lives and have had the opportunity to teach and journey through life with them. Seriously… I have to hold myself back when I meet new teenage girls from just asking them a million questions and just jumping into deep, nosy conversations! I am positive I WILL have (bio or adopted) and raise a daughter. I am a daughter myself and have a great momma who raised me.
BUT… there’s a twist here I just discovered! I had the privilege of hearing John Croyle from the Big Oak Ranch (LOVE LOVE LOVE that ministry by the way – we WILL be getting involved ASAP!) speak a few weeks ago. He talked about his book that will be coming out soon – Raising a Princess – Eight Essential Virtues to Teach Your Daughter. As he was talking about the different virtues he explains more in-depth about in his book, he said to the parents of boys that we should be praying for our future DAUGHTER-IN-LAWS!! Ahhh! I know that’s kind of a DUH statement for a lot of you… but as a 26 year old with a 14 year old boy… kinda slapped me in the face. I need to be praying for my future daughter-in-law NOW! He said that sharks/lions are coming for daughter-in-law… which is so true!! We must pray against it! I want my daughter/daughter-in-law to be pure and striving after Jesus… so I better get on it! Maybe it’s one of your daughters I am praying for… now that would be funny! 🙂 I’ll be a good mother-in-law… I promise!
I think we can all use some things to pray over girls these days – girls we teach, minister with/to, parent, etc. They are fighting some HUGE… and I mean HUGE… battles! So first, I’m going to steal from John Croyle’s talk and book… because I think it’s was just so so good! And then… I’m going to share the 10 things I’ve prayed over all my girls that I learned from my mentor, Kelly.
John Croyle’s awesome points – We must raise daughters/girls to be princesses of the King of Kings. They will become godly women. This is a list that we can pray over our girls/daughters/daughter-in-laws… but also a list that challenged me to be more… and better. He uses an acrostic to help us raise/teach them to be PRINCESSes:
Praiseworthy: Daughters/girls should be told of their worth and their beauty – not only outward beauty but the worth they have in Christ. They are daughters of the King of the Universe. If they know how the Sovereign God feels about them and the amount of love He has for them, they will be FEARLESS! They will be able to say NO in situations that are easy to say YES in and will know where their identity lies!!! A girl who knows what her identity is and where it lies is a gem! Knowing that protects them from so many lies.
Charm is deceptive, and beauty is fleeting;
but a woman who fears the Lord is to be praised. Proverbs 31:30
Righteous: Daughters/Girls need to know the seriousness of sin and how to fight it with wisdom and discernment. Talking about these things… even the hard, uncomfortable things in the home has eternal worth! Honoring the Lord and knowing Him is the most important thing. If a girl can fall in love with Jesus, the righteous heart will come. When girls can TRULY grasp how great our God is, He will reveal to her the harm of sin and the goodness in following His ways.
She speaks with wisdom,
and faithful instruction is on her tongue. Proverbs 31:26
Initiative: I love this! Daughters/Girls should have the ability and freedom to DREAM! Their dreams and goals shouldn’t be squashed… but supported and helped. This doesn’t mean to support them on their every whim and get them whatever they dream up. This is a challenge to help them find their true passion/calling and encourage them to follow it with all their hearts. I’m thankful for a momma and a family who have supported me to follow my heart to interpreting, adopting, missions, teaching, and beyond! Spur them on to GREAT THINGS!
“Many women do noble things,
but you surpass them all.” Proverbs 31:29
Nurturing: Encourage your daughters/girls to become WOMEN! Women have an innate ability to nurture, care for, and love others… give her opportunities to do so! The image of a family has been distorted in our culture. Girls are not becoming women as they were purposed to be. The use of the term “the modern family” has come to explain a home that’s steering clear of God’s Word. I loved what John Croyle said about this. He said “In actuality, the modern family is the man standing up and saying ENOUGH!” AMEN! We have to teach our girls/daughters to be women who love and care for others.
She opens her arms to the poor
and extends her hands to the needy. Proverbs 31:20
Character: THIS IS HUGE!!! Character can’t be taught with just words. Character… who someone TRULY is… cannot be hidden and cannot be faked. Character is only learned by EXAMPLE! It must start in the home… in our everyday lives. We have to show girls/daughters what following Jesus LOOKS LIKE! How we interact with other women, how we present ourselves (COVER UP!), how we conduct ourselves on social media, how we treat our husbands, etc. It has to be modeled… they are watching us.
A wife of noble character who can find?
She is worth far more than rubies. Proverbs 31:10
Empowerment: John Croyle said this – “walking in a powerful way honors God” & “a woman with power can dominate any room.” These are true statements. When women walk in the power of the Holy Spirit – NOT man-made power/ego – it is a beautiful and powerful thing. When women are confident that they are loved by their Savior… they are UNSTOPPABLE. Unstoppable in any arena, any relationship, and any dream!
Her husband has full confidence in her
and lacks nothing of value.
She brings him good, not harm,
all the days of her life. Proverbs 31:11-12
Servant-hearted: All throughout Proverbs 31 (you know… the passage that talks about this made-up women that can’t be attained? Yea… that one) the woman described personifies a servant-heart. She rises early, stays up late, works hard, dreams big, and puts others in front of herself… ALWAYS. Our girls/daughters should see this in us. We should be teaching them how to humbly serve and joyfully do with/for others WITHOUT COMPLAINING – in our homes, in our work, in our relationships with others.
She is clothed with strength and dignity;
she can laugh at the days to come. Proverbs 31:25
Stable: Oh… that our girls/daughters would be stable and consistent!!! Praying for them to not be swayed by whatever boy/thing is put in front of them is of utmost importance. Although life and circumstances will not always be stable or consistent, for them to know that Jesus is the Umovable Rock and that their faith can rest in Him is KEY!!!
When it snows, she has no fear for her household;
for all of them are clothed in scarlet. Proverbs 31:21
Good good stuff, huh? I just loved it… and had to share it. Now I have to go read the book… and the book on raising sons!
And here’s the 10 things I’ve prayed over my girls since I started in girls’ ministry – which is my heart and my passion!!
- She would be passionate about her Savior
- She would be a wise decision maker
- She would stand boldly for what is right
- She wouldn’t be lazy or apathetic
- She would desire and choose healthy relationships
- She would be a lover of Truth
- She would stand firm against all temptation
- She would remain pure in thought and deed
- She would be an inviter
- She would rest in the delight that God has for her
So… there it is. My thoughts and hopes. My goal in loving on girls, raising a daughter on day, and praying for my daughter-in-law. Good luck out there! Girls are great… and crazy!